parenthood

Five Weeks And Counting

We are t-minus five weeks for Baby Voreblog. Some friends and family have been asking for more regular updates, which are happy to provide in the following Q & A format.

xx

Erin, how are you feeling?

Like the turkey in Christmas Vacation just before it explodes. And like I want some eggs.

Have you maintained a healthy workout regimen?

Well, according to the tiny Asian woman who was lifting weights while I stretched, I am “doing right thing. Exercise is good. You’ll have easier delivery. Just take it easy. Trust me, I’m ob/gyn nurse!”

Have other strangers approached you at the gym?

A couple. Mostly older males. Much older males with very high-waisted shorts and combovers. Ben calls them my “Y boyfriends.” They love to tell me that I’m working out and eating for two. One of them has a daughter who’s expecting in October. He checks in on me every time I’m there.

If your Shuffle workout mix is any indication, what will Baby Voreblog’s musical tastes be like?

Baby Voreblog will really like Girl Talk, Why? and “Drunk Girls.”

Hmmm. So, any special cravings?

Not really, until we went to Nada last weekend with our friends Dusty and Lauren and had churros for dessert. Now I want Nada churros on the hour every hour.

Any hints about possible names?

We have picked a boy name and girl name but they’re under wraps. One is a family name, the other we just like. Our parents have spent endless hours guessing. We’re not telling.

Any mother’s intuition if it’s a boy or a girl?

I don’t know and I don’t care so long as it doesn’t have whiskers and cough up hairballs.

How is Scooter Thomas taking this?

He doesn’t like being excluded from the nursery by the baby gate. He does like the proliferation of baby product boxes lying around downstairs. And the gift ribbons, which he chews and eats so he can regurgitate them at three in the morning.

How’s the nursery coming along?

Almost done. We still need to hang pictures and a bird cage. Pics are coming soon!

Have you picked a pediatrician yet?

Yes, in fact, we have. After a rigorous screening of the many pediatricians in the Greater Cincinnati area, we have decided on the expert care of Dr. Leo Spacemen.

We happened to be watching “Access Hollywood” the other night and saw its special on celebrities and their bodies after pregnancy. How long do you think it will take to lose the baby weight?

Actually I’m thinking about keeping it.

And how does Ben feel about this?

Ben better keep delivering me the churros is all I gots to say.

Is Ben keeping up with his husbandly duties (i.e., foot massages, glasses of milk before bedtime, assembly of various baby items)?

For the most part. Every Sunday night he brings home Yagööt after he gets off work. But it should be noted he hasn’t gone out and purchased eggs this morning.

Ben, anything to add?

I’m still not 100% convinced this hasn’t been an elaborate scheme to get out of litterbox duty for the past 35 weeks. But I’m starting to come around.

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7 thoughts on “Five Weeks And Counting

  1. I’m a little jealous that people are checking on you at the gym…when I was there I just got horrified looks like I was going to have the baby on the elliptical.

  2. I’ve received plenty of those looks too. You know, the concerned/appalled look that says, “If You Deliver Right Here, Right Now, I Am Not Going To Be Happy That You Ruined My Workout.”

  3. No Katie! Remember the guy at your work gym who was a marathon runner and told you that you were an inspiration to him? I love that story!

  4. Scooter T can come to Winnie after the birth, and they can discuss their depression and wishes for the ol’ days.

    Also, if you need a pick me up before Baby Voreblog arrives, go watch “Dumpster Baby” from It’s Always Sunny:)

    Hang in there, Voreblog.

  5. Emily, “Dumpster Baby” was the first thing I watched after school let out. My thought was that at the very least we’ll be better parents than Dee and Mac. My favorite scene? Taking DB to the tanning bed and Mac exclaiming, “Just to get a base…”

  6. Katie 1, you’re right…although that was in the workout room at my office, not the Blue Ash Y…so I think people there were more sane all around :-).

    Regardless…Erin, you are an inspiration to me (even though I’m not a marathon runner)!

  7. Dr. Spaceman didn’t want to be a pediatrician at first because he thought it dealt with urine and diets. Then when he found out what pediatricians do he was glad he kept his mouth shut.

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