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Helping You Pass The Work Day: A Diversionary, Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Voreblog Readers Forum

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Andrew Cashmere recently pleaded for something, anything, to help him pass the time at work. (Disclaimer: He works at a slaughterhouse.) He then offered the following four topics for consideration:

  • Favorite bad movies
  • Famous actor that would play you in the movie of your life
  • Why Pittsburgh Steelers fans are awful
  • Would you rather: Lorelai or Rory? (and why)

So as to make this equal opportunity for the sexes, we will add the fifth topic to counterbalance #4:

  • Would you rather: Bob Wallace or Phil Davis?

(We saw White Christmas last night at the Aronoff.)

Take your pick! Answer any of the above five! (And keep it tasteful!)

Comment now!

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11 thoughts on “Helping You Pass The Work Day: A Diversionary, Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Voreblog Readers Forum

  1. I need some time to think about these, but I get things started with this.

    -I would like either John Krasinski or Will Arnett. Can you imagine Will Arnett saying SHA-BLAM?

    -Lorelai is smoking hot, in a “had a kid in highschool, but still wholesome” way. I have no doubt that she is a complete tiger. Luke Danes is a lucky man. So is Christopher. And that guy that made her sleep in the other room.

    -Phil Davis gives me a tingle in my bottom.

  2. With regard to #2- idk- who is the prettiest actress in Hollywood?
    #5- easy. Bob Wallace. I’d let him sweeten my pancakes anytime.

  3. Andrew, you don’t help your case at all for being a straight man when you talk so “intelligently” about Gilmore Girls;) I wonder how many people actually understood your comment.

    As for who would play me in the movie of myself…I think I like Rachel McAdams (even though she’s Canadian).

    As for question #5: I would have to go with Bob Wallace played by Bing Crosby – I love those eyes! Shaaa-Blaaam!

  4. 1. Proof of Life, Willow, Pirates of the Caribbean, The Burbs, National Treasure, Better Off Dead, Rounders, Taken, Super Troopers and Whispering Hearts.

    I’d probably put Role Models on this list if I had actually seen it yet.

    2. I want John Stockton to play me in the movie of my life. Or Richard Kiel.

    3. Where to start? Thankfully at least one of them is comfortable poking fun at herself though.

    4. From the one episode of “The Gilmore Girls” that I have now seen in my lifetime, I can say with certainty that I do not like Lorelai. But Rory looks twelve. So I feel dirty answering this question. Which may have been Mr. Cashmere’s point.

  5. Better Off Dead as a favorite bad movie? I’m so disappointed. That is a favorite great movie. Nothing bad about it, ya’ll. HOW DARE YOU QUESTION LANE MEYER!!!!

    Anywhatzers, lemme answer your querstions:

    Favorite bad movie: Bubble Boy. I’ve seen it 10 times, probably more. Or UHF. It was always meant to be bad, but that doesn’t keep me from absolutely loving it. It’s brilliant!

    Actor to play me: Wall-E

    Steelers fans: I don’t think they’re awful. I support their traditions. My bias against the “who dey’s” and “who dat’s” of the world is no secret, though.

    I have never seen Gilmore Girls or White Christmas, so I am unqualified to answer these questions. But I will say that Rory, even now, still looks too young. Plus, that other one was pretty hot in Bad Santa, so that’s my answer.

  6. 1) any movie starring Nic Cage.
    2) Nic Cage.
    3) isn’t Nic Cage a Steelers fan?
    4) let me ask Nic Cage and get back to you.
    5) let me ask Nic Cage and get back to you.

    I could have said Turkey but that’s already been done.

  7. 1. Super Troopers (because I don’t want a large Farva, Ben), Westworld, Roadhouse (R.I.P. Swayze), Logan’s Run, ROLE MODELS.

    2. Clooney. Or 50 Cent.

    3. They’re awful because they’ve been unable to attain the level of douchebaggery reached by 99.9% of Bengals fans?

    4. Thank you Matthew Leathers you reminding me of the old(er) one in Bad Santa.

    5. I didn’t know who they were until I googled it. You’re surprised? See #1 above. I OWN those movies.

  8. 1. The Wraith, Super Troopers, both Matrix sequels, The Ninth Gate, Evil Dead 2, and Rocky III.

    2. Philip Seymour Hoffman. Yes, I know I’m not doing myself any favors here…

    3. The level of obnoxiousness regularly oozing out of every one of their loud, boorish, drunken pores. Steeler fans make UK basketball fans pale into nothingness by comparison.

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