We aren’t usually in the habit of quoting from flyers left under our wiper blades in parking lots, but the one somebody put on our car at the Showcase Cinemas in Milford — the one which begins with the quote above (two question marks and all) — presented us with a question we honestly had never once given a lick of thought: What if the swine flu vaccine is the Mark of the Beast?(?) Have biblical scholars misread The Book of Revelation for the past two millennia? Were the Left Behind books actually … fiction? And maybe most troubling of all, why was our car the only one in the entire parking lot with this flyer left on it? (????????????) If the H1N1 vaccine is The Mark of the Beast, shouldn’t everyone be forewarned?
As the flyer says, “Forget Pre-tribulation scenarios.” We, for one, were hazy on our Pre-tribulation scenarios to begin with. If you want your own answers regarding the alleged diabolicalness of the swine flu vaccine, you won’t find them at your doctor’s office (also known as “The Innermost Circle of Hell”). There’s only one place you can find them: our trash can.