friends, sports, Uncategorized

Celtics Win! Celtics Win!

Running dialogue from Game Six of the NBA Finals at the Cicak residence last night:

ERIN: So, let me get this straight. Do we have to watch any more games after this one?

BEN: No. The Celtics are going to win in five minutes and thirteen seconds.

ERIN: But they’ve won before.

BEN: But this is going to be their fourth win. It’s best-of-seven.

ERIN: Thank the Lord.

MIKE CICAK: KG looks like a human preying mantis.

GAIL CICAK: Yeah, he kind of does.

ERIN: Those players look so disgusting and sweaty. It must be so smelly in that arena right now.

MIKE: I bet it’s pretty well-ventilated.

ERIN: I would just kill myself if I had to be there.

BEN: Hey, does everybody remember the time Erin thought the Crosstown Shoot-Out was a game of horse?

(Laughter all around except from ERIN.)

ERIN: Whatever. At least I know the Xavier X-U cheer.

MIKE: I apologize in advance for the world of hurt you all are about to be in.

ERIN: Are they really going to keep chanting “Na Na Nah Nahh, Na Na Nah Nahhh, Hey! Hey! Hey! Gooood-bye” for the next four minutes and thirty-one seconds?

GAIL: What are you talking about?

BEN: Oh, I smell it.

GAIL: Sweetie.

MIKE: I couldn’t help myself.

ERIN: I apologize too.

BEN: Don’t threaten her! It’s like when animals need to express their dominance when challenged.

GAIL: I’m going to open a window.

ERIN: Is that Jason Schwartzman playing for the Lakers?

MIKE: That’s Sasha Vujacic.

ERIN: He looks like he really smells.

MIKE: Do you guys want to hear a joke? What did the brown chicken say to the brown cow before they made out?

BEN and ERIN: I don’t know.

MIKE: Brownchickenbrowncow!

BEN: I got one. How many Polish firemen does it take to put out a house fire?

MIKE and GAIL: How many?

BEN: Forty-nine. One to hold the hose and forty-eight to pick the house up and move it back and forth.

ERIN: Where did you hear that one?

BEN: SNL.

MIKE: Lamar Odom’s pretty good, but I’ve always thought he could’ve been great. I guess he smoked too much dope.

GAIL: How do you know that?

MIKE: Everybody knows that.

BEN: If this conversation somehow ends up on our blog someday, I’ll be sure to footnote it so that no one thinks we’re maliciously slandering him or anything.

GAIL: NBA players are allowed to do that?

MIKE: Hey, have you guys ever felt a baby kick?

ERIN: Ooh! Can I feel?

MIKE: Yeah, come over here.

BEN: This is the happiest I’ve ever been at the end of an NBA season.

MIKE: Put your hand there. Sweetie, is he kicking tonight?

GAIL: You have to talk to him. He might need to wake up.

MIKE: HEY! WAKE UP!

ERIN: Nothing yet.

MIKE: LITTLE MAN, MOVE!

GAIL: Did you know he’s four pounds right now?

ERIN: Wait, there was something. I don’t think it was a kick though.

MIKE: It might’ve been his butt. He likes to shake his butt when he dances.

BEN: Did you guys hear that? I think Jeff Van Gundy is coming on to John Havlicek.

ERIN: He’s really shakin’ it now.

MIKE: DANCE, LITTLE MAN! DANCE!

ERIN: Is it finally over?

BEN: No, it’s just a commercial.

ERIN: How do the players know when a commercial’s over and they can start playing again?

BEN: Well, in football, a man in a yellow shirt steps onto the field and play can’t start again until he steps off.

MIKE: I know two people in the world who still like to eat their boogers. My friend Adam and Wally Szczerbiak.

ERIN: I used to keep a pick pad in elementary school.

MIKE: What’s a pick pad?

BEN: I thought boogers tasted good when I was a kid.

MIKE: Dude, this makes me nauseous. We can’t keep talking about this.

GAIL: Did they just dump Gatorade on that coach?

MIKE: I’ve never seen that before in an NBA game!

BEN: David Stern cannot be happy.

ERIN: Is the Gatorade on the playing field? What if somebody slips on it?

MIKE: I’m just glad we’re not talking about boogers anymore.

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5 thoughts on “Celtics Win! Celtics Win!

  1. Laughing out loud when you share an office with 4 other people is awkward. I hope baby Cicak gets Gails ghetto dance moves…

  2. Is the gatorade on the playing field? Didn’t you PLAY basketball Erbo? Yeah…I remember, I never wanted to guard you b/c you would fart & stink up the playing field!

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